Lessons through Infertility

I want to finish up this week of infertility awareness by sharing a few things I have learned from my experiences so far (and am still learning).   

1. Patience - This has been a struggle of mine my entire life, and I guess Heavenly Father just wanted to  make sure I kept working on it! When you have been waiting a very long time for something you desperately want, you learn to have more patience. There is a great quote that Mrs. R from the r house blog often shares, and I love it. "Everywhere in nature we are taught the lessons of patience and waiting. We want things a long time before we get them, and the fact that we want them a long time makes them all the more precious when they come." (Joseph F. Smith)  But it's still really difficult some days!   

2.  Not to compare my life to others - Wow, has this been hard!  Especially when all my friends were starting to have babies and I wasn't.  I thought, "I'm doing everything I'm supposed to be doing, and this is a righteous desire, so why am I being denied this great blessing of having children?"  The thing that helped was when I finally stopped comparing my life to everyone else's.  I have to trust that Heavenly Father knows what he's doing and has a plan for me and my family.  For some reason, that means I have to wait a little longer to become a mother.  Everyone has their own problems and trials, and this is mine right now.

3. A greater sense of humor! - Laughter can help lighten the mood of a stressful or awkward moment, and we have had plenty of those.  I hear all the time from other people also dealing with infertility about the offensive comments they sometimes get.  I really can't think of anytime that's ever happened to me.  I just remind myself that we all have said things without thinking, and usually people are not trying to be insensitive or unkind.  I choose not to take offense, but instead try to laugh it off.  I can't even count how many people have told me that I'll get pregnant once we adopt!  Sometimes I'll explain that it can't happen to me (w/o medical intervention, at least), but usually I just smile and laugh about it later. 

4.  How to draw closer to my Savior - I think this is the greatest lesson anyone can learn from whatever trials they experience, and it's definitely true for me.  At times when I feel like no one else understands what I am going through, Jesus Christ understands perfectly.  I have felt him take away my pain and sorrow and replace it with comfort and hope.  I am truly thankful for the things I have gone through so far because it has brought me closer to my Father in Heaven and my Savior, Jesus Christ.  I always thought it was strange when I heard other people say they were thankful for their trials, but now I know why they felt that way.

Believe me when I say these are things I am still improving on every day.  I am thankful to my friends and family who have ever listened to me talk and/or complain about my infertility.   It is helpful to talk through things that weigh on my mind.  I don't want anyone thinking I'm depressed though, because I'm not!  Sure, I have my down days once in a while, but I am usually hopeful and happy.  I hope my friends who become pregnant will not ever be afraid to tell me, because I honestly am so happy when that happens, and I want to share in celebrating your good news!  I am extremely excited for the journey of adoption that awaits for Jacob and me.  I have already made so many new friends because of it.  I can't wait to see how our story unfolds!